You know your Afghan when....

Sudafed is the number one cure for any sickness, no questions asked. I SAID NO QUESTIONS NOW SWALLOW THE FUCKING PILL.

When we know guests are coming over our homes must be as clean as if a British Nanny recently went to town.

Tea is best served with everything. Including itself.

Fuck Educamacation that's what we have like 12 kids for.

You know you've hit it big when people call you by the title of your business. Example: of look their goes the Pizza Shop owner! and look here comes the owner of (insert local hookah bar name here) look smart and maybe he'll give you discount!

Your kid has at some point in their life played a Halo game.

The only future you see for your kid is to be either an Engineer or a Doctor.

You watch Ariana T.V.

You've cried at the end of some indian movie.

Your t.v. sucks.

Your oven is never NOT in use.

Don't ask where it came from, just eat it.

Christmas = no. :(

You're taking like 12 different types of pills.

You only NEED to take 11 diffrent types of pills. ;)

You have a hairy ass.

You have family in Europe.

You hate EVERY race/ethnicity but your own.

If there is a way to get around paying for something you WILL find it.

Mexican candy is THE SHIT! (No matter how much lead is in it.)

The only CDs you have in your car play indian music.

Speaking of cars, your's probably still has a cassette player in it to play classics that you saved from "the mother country"

You think Pakistani's are icky.

You don't trust Jews. (Except with your taxes)

Rambo 3 is your favorite american movie of all time only because it took place in Afghanistan.

Your wedding will be VERY LOUD and has already been planned out by your parents.

Your future wife/husband will be VERY LOUD and has already been planned out for you by your parents.

Your computer still has a 56k jack in it somewhere...

Deodarant? What's that?

(applies to san diego only) You've been to the Crystal Ballroom for someting or other AT LEAST 20 times. (end)

You don't see why white people make a big deal over owning a "persian rug" you have like 20 of them.

YOur freezer is full of meat.

Speeding is okay.

Red lights mean go faster.

When the police pull you over you pretend to not know english.

You have at one point or other been in possession of satan sheets.

You hate Russians.

When you get into a car accident it's ALWAYS the other person's fault.

Wal-Mart is a family adventure; Costco too.